卡特曼與霍比特人
卡特曼與霍比特人是南方公園工作室為2012年斯派克電視遊戲獎（SpikeTV Video Game Awards）創作的短片，該獎項於2012年12月7日頒獎。
背景[]
在這部短片的開頭，一個小霍比特人正在檢查一個戒指。埃瑞克·卡特曼穿着他在「護戒使團再臨雙塔」和在南方公園：真理之杖中穿過的巫師服接近霍比特人，並試圖說服他讓他殺死所有的嬉皮士。
霍比特人感到不明所以，他拒絕了卡特曼的請求，並強調說他正在尋找龍的寶藏。這激怒了卡特曼，他宣佈霍比特人應該尊重他的權威。隨後，卡特曼用手杖猛擊霍比特人的頭部，並轉過身去面對參加VGA頒獎典禮的觀眾。卡特曼歡迎觀眾的到來，打開了燈光，播放了音樂，然後介紹了主持頒獎典禮的塞繆爾·L·傑克遜。
冷知識[]
- 卡特曼介紹塞繆爾·L·傑克遜是「黑客帝國裏面那個光頭的傢伙」。事實上傑克遜在該系列任何一部電影中都沒有出場，卡特曼很可能把他和扮演莫菲斯的勞倫斯·菲什伯恩搞混了。
劇本[]
| 卡特曼與霍比特人 | |
| A fertile, fantasy land. A small hobbit is examining a ring. | |
| The most beloved fantasy story of all time is now a fully-animated video game. It is the tale of a small hobbit and a great wizard who appeared to him, one day. [Eric Cartman, the wizard, steps forward] | |
| All right dude, check it out. Go, like, that way, and then up this one mountain, and then kill all the Hippies you come across. | |
| Kill— hippies? No, no; I'm searching for a dragon's treasure! | |
| I'm the wizard, you're the dwarf, and you will respect my authoritah! [hits the Hobbit with his staff] | |
| I am no dwarf! And that staff gives you no authority. | |
| Yes it does, look right here. [lowers the staff] See? Look closer, look closer. [the Hobbit leans forward] RESPECT! [clubs the Hobbit, drawing blood] MY! [clubs him again] AUTHORITAH! [clubs him a final time, then turns to the camera] Humans, Elves, and half-Jews everywhere! Welcome to the Tenth Anniversary of the VGA Awards! Let there be lights! [lights shine] Let there be music! [music begins] And now, here is your host for the evening: That bald guy from The Matrix! Samuel Leroy Jackson! | |
| 卡特曼與霍比特人 結束 | |