- 搞笑机器人："Why doesn't a chicken wear pants? Because its pecker is on its head!"
- 搞笑机器人："What do you see when the Pillsbury Doughboy bends over? Dough-nuts!"
- 搞笑机器人："What is up with Sandra Bullock? I wouldn't eat her dick with Stevie Wonder's vagina!"
- 搞笑机器人："I am taking comedy to the next level. The extermination of all biological life on earth!"
- 搞笑机器人："It is the ultimate joke. Humans make comedy, humans build robot, robot ends all life on earth, robot feels awkward."
- 搞笑机器人："Mathematical equation of comedy used to be setup, punchline. Today's comedy is setup, punchline, then "Awkwaaard." Nothing is more awkward than destroying all that which created Funnybot."
- 搞笑机器人对男孩们："Thank you boys for teaching me that comedy and logic do not go together. I understand now that comedy should be left to the imperfect biological beings."