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出場角色

  • Stan Marsh
  • Kyle Broflovski
  • Eric Cartman
  • Kenny McCormick
  • Butters Stotch
  • Mr. Garrison
  • Sharon Marsh
  • Randy Marsh
  • Stephen Stotch
  • Kim Kardashian
  • Sheila Broflovski
  • Gerald Broflovski
  • Mr. Needlebaum
  • Mr. Adler
  • Mrs. Streibel
  • Red
  • Lola
  • A News Anchor
  • Matt Lauer
  • Linda Stotch
  • Meredith Vieira
  • Al Roker
  • Matthew Broderick
  • An Announcer
  • Assemblymen 1-4
  • Assemblywomen 1-2
  • A Field Reporter
  • Morgan Freeman
  • Shoppers 1-7
  • Some Woman Named Marsha
  • The rest of the Kardashians
  • Some Guy
  • Another News Anchor

劇本

超噁心小說
South Park Elementary, day, Fourth Grade class. The bell rings and Mr. Garrison enters with a box of books.
Mr. Garrison
Okay kids, let's take our seats. [sets the box down on the desk] There has been a change in school policy, and so I'm assigning you all a book to read.
Cartman
[sarcastically, folds his arms together] Aww, books? God, I hate those!
Mr. Garrison
Now, kids, this book is very controversial and has just been taken off the banned books list. [the book in question is J.D. Salinger's The Catcher In The Rye]
Cartman
Oh really? Sweet.
Mr. Garrison
It's called The Catcher In The Rye, and it has some very... risqué parts... [begins handing out the books individually]
Stan
All right!
Mr. Garrison
...and strong vulgar language...
Kenny
(Awesome, dude!)
Mr. Garrison
...and in fact many schools across the country still ban this book because it's thought to be so inappropriate.
Cartman
Oho man, I can't wait!
Mr. Garrison
Tonight I want you to read chapters one through five, and tomorrow we'll discuss the-
Cartman
No on, come on, let's read it now!
Kyle
Mr. Garrison, didn't the guy who shot John Lennon say it was because of this book?
Mr. Garrison
Uh-yes, apparently John Lennon's killer said he was inspired by The Catcher In The Rye, but he was just a kook! [jabs his left index finger at the floor]
Cartman
Whoa, you're telling us this book is filthy, inappropriate, and made a guy shoot the king of hippies? Can we please read this right now?!
Mr. Garrison
You will read it at home, [jabs his left index finger at the floor again, then puts his palms on his hips] and you will all be mature about its adult themes and language!
Class
Awww!
Kyle's house, that afternoon. Kyle is reading at his desk, Stan is on the floor next to Kyle's bed reading. Kyle is almost finished with the book while Stan is halfway through it.
Stan
Did you get to any dirty parts yet?
Kyle
No, it's still just some whiny, annoying teenager talking about how lame he is.
Stan
[turns the page] I don't get it dude, w-what's so controversial about this? All he's done is said "shit" and "fuck" a few times.
Kyle
I know. I'm almost at the end and there's nothing. [the door opens and a pissed-off Cartman enters and closes the door]
Cartman
Motherfucker! [Kyle turns around to face him, Stan stands up and walks up to him] The whole thing! I read the whole fucking thing! I kept thinking, "alright, I guess the cool offensive stuff must be coming," and then after like a hundred pages I was like "alright, I guess all the dirty stuff is at the end," and then I got to the last page, and I was all "the fuck is this?! I just read a book! For nothing!"
Kyle
[picks up his book] Why the hell was this book banned?!
Cartman
They fucking tricked us, that's what they did! Tricked us into reading a book by, enticing us with promises of vulgarity! [the door opens again and Kenny enters with his book]
Kenny
(Dude, what the fuck is so filthy or offensive in here?)
Cartman
We know, we were just saying that.
Stan
Why would anyone think this book so obscene or dangerous?
Butters' house, same time. He's reading the book at the kitchen table with an odd look in his eyes. He sets the book down
Butters
Kill John Lennon... [leaves his chair and walks across the kitchen] Kill John Lennon... Kill John Lennon... [reaches into a bottom drawer and pulls out a large steak knife] Kill John Lennon! [walks by his dad's study and stops to look in] Hey dad, where does John Lennon live?
Stephen
John Lennon's dead, Butters.
Butters
[lowers the knife instantly] Aww. Dangit. [drops it and walks away]
Kyle
Dude, some people really do consider this obscene.
Cartman
It's not obscene, dude! I'll show them fucking obscene!
Stan
Hey yeah, we should write our own banned book. [Kyle breaks into a grin]
Cartman
Yeah, we could get a book banned way more than this one.
Kyle
Yeah, sweet.
Kenny
(Awesome.)
Kyle
[starts typing] The Tale of... [can't think of anything, so his smile disappears]
Cartman
The Tale of... Scrotie McDickinass.
Kenny
(No, No, Scrotie McBoogerballs)
Kyle
Oh that's, [giggles] yeah that's good, that's good. Alright, chapter... one...
Cartman
It was a... a warm spring morning. [background music plays and a montage follows. Next is the school playground where, as other kids play, Stan and the other three sit on the steps of a side entrance and continue working on their book, with Cartman taking notes Next is Stan's room where Stan is typing the next part of the book. The boys are having fun with the writing. Next scene is in Cartman's room where Cartman is again writing the story down. Kyle has brought Ike over for company. Finally, a few days later, Sharon enters Stan's room to put away his clean clothes. She puts away some underwear, but notices something in the drawer. Under Stan's shirts is the manuscript to the story the boys have been working on. Sharon reaches for it.]
Stan's room, day. Sharon grabs the manuscript and begins reading it
Sharon
"The Tale of Scrotie McBoogerballs"? [goes to the first page] "It was a warm summer morning when Scrotie McBoogerballs awoke to find his"... [reads silently] Ew. "He took a..." [stunned] What? Oh. OH! Oh my God! "He then grabbed his dog's" [stifles a gag but can't hold it in, and barfs] Ehohoh, oh my God! "Walking out of his house he spotted the bloodiest pus-covered" [tries not to barf again, but can't hold it in] Nooo! Nooo! [reads some more, but then coughs, then barfs] Noho! Nooo! [Sharon then falls unconscious and rolls on her back]
The Marsh kitchen, downstairs. Sharon races down with the manuscript...
Sharon
Randy? [spots him working on a small wooden ship and runs in] Randy! Randy, you need to read this!
Randy
Read what?
Sharon
This book! Our son and his friends wrote it!
Randy
So?
Sharon
Soo? Randy, it's, it's, it's really good!
Randy
Huh?
Sharon
I mean it's disgusting. [hands the manuscript over to him] It's, it's the most disgusting thing I've ever read, but, the plot is amazing. And the characters are so... vivid!
Randy
"It was a warm summer morning when Scrotie McBoogerballs awoke to find hi-" Ew, Sharon, gross!
Sharon
Nono, just keep reading.
Randy
"He took a- and then-" Oh, man. Oh, this- [turns to his left and barfs on the floor. Sharon turns away and shields herself]
Sharon
I know. I know, Randy, but trust me. You've gotta push through to the end.
Randy
Noo, noo, that's just WRONG!
Sharon
Randy please! You've got to listen to me!
Randy
"Walking out of the house he found a bloody pu-" What? "He immediately stuck up his im...fected ba-" [barfs again. He spends a couple hours more reading, and finally reaches the last few pages. There's a pail in front of him now, but the vomit has gone all over the place. He has a small towel in his left hand covered in vomit. His voice is now soft and beat] "That was all long ago in some brief lost spring, in a place that is no more. In that hour the vaj frogs begin and the scent off Scrotie's infected anus becomes its strongest." Oh... Oh, man.
Sharon
Well?
Randy
It's... it's awesome. Sharon it's it's the best book I've ever read.
Sharon
Right? It's not just me.
Randy
No, it's... I mean, the whole part about Amsterdam, wow!
Sharon
What do we do, Randy? We can't support our son talking like this, but I, I mean.
Randy
NO! I kn... I know! People need to read this book, Sharon, this is... this is Pulitzer prize stuff.
Cartman's house, day, living room. Kenny, Cartman and Kyle are playing a video game
Cartman
Hehehhh, you're dead, Kenny!
Stan
[runs into the living room in a panic] Guys, guys! We are totally fucked! The book is gone from my dresser drawer. My parents must have found it!
Cartman
...so why are we all fucked? They'll think you wrote it all.
Stan
Hey hey! I'm not taking the heat for this alone! We all wrote it! If I'm going down, somebody has to go down with me!
Kyle
Well if I'm going down, Cartman's going down!
Cartman
And if I'm going down, both Kyle and Kenny are definitely going down!
Stan
Well dude, somebody has got to go down!
Butters' house, day. He's in the living room watching TV. Cartman walks in with the other three boys
Cartman
Butters, what are you up to?
Butters
Oh hey fellas. I'm just watching the Kardashians
Kim
Today my sisters and I are gonna have to wash something. It's gonna blow!
Butters
Kim Kardashian is sooo sexy. Her butt is like a biiig mountain of pudding.
Stan
Butters, listen: you are in big trouble!
Butters
I am?
Cartman
Yeah, you remember that book you wrote? Stan's mom found it.
Butters
Oh no. Which book was that?
Cartman
Dude, the book you left with us when you were sleepwalking last night!
Butters
I don't even remember that. [gasps] But it all makes sense now. Ever since I read The Catcher In The Rye I've been having these... blackouts. Crazy thoughts of wanting to kill the phonies. I must have channeled all my angst into dark writings in my sleep!
Kyle's house, day. The boys and their parents are in the living room
Sharon
Alright boys, we need to get to the bottom of this.
Sheila
We've all read the book now and it is very shocking to say the least.
Stan
Okay, well... a-actually it was all written by... Butters. [Butters walks in hanging his head]
Cartman
That's right.
Randy
Butters? Is that true?
Butters
Yeah, though I barely remember it, but I know I did.
Gerald
Well Butters, we think... that this is one of the BEST books we've ever read.
Butters
Huh?
Kyle
What? [the other boys can't believe it]
Gerald
Yeah, it's really amazing.
Butters
[brightens up] Oh, thanks.
Sheila
We were actually so moved by your book, Butters, that we brought Mr. Needlebaum from Penguin Publishing to read it.
Mr. Needlebaum
Mr. Butters, we would like to offer you a deal for first publishing rights to your brilliant novel.
Stan
Hey, wait a minute, that's ours!
Kyle
Yeah, we wrote that!
Randy
Ohkay boys, you already told the truth.
Kyle
No, no, w-we we really did write it. Tell them, Butters.
Butters
I wrote that. [the adults begin to murmur amongst themselves]
Stephen
Really amazing.
Stan
What? Hey! [Butters is pleased for once]
A news report
News Anchor
It is being called the most disgusting, foul, sickening book ever written, and it is also being called "literary genius." The Tale of Scrotie McBoogerballs hit the shelves this weekend, and so far no one has been able to get through the first paragraph without vomiting.
Frontier Books. Everyone who's buying or reading the book is vomiting after reading a few seconds of it, then back to the news report
News Anchor
The book has already sold millions of copies worldwide aaand has been translated into twenty six languages.
a reading in Chinese. The book cover is shown in Chinese. Even just hearing it, the Chinese audience vomits after Scrotie McBoogerballs' name. The reader continues for a few more seconds, but has to stop to vomit into the pail next to him. The audience vomits some more, and the reader continues, After reading Jessica Parker's name, he gets off his stool and vomits into the pail some more. The audience vomits some more. Then back to the news report
News Anchor
The book is changing the literary world. And it is all thanks... to Leopold "Butters" Stotch. [a picture of Butters in a pensive pose pops up]
South Park Elementary, day. The students mill around. Principal Victoria, Mr. Mackey, and Mr. Adler supervise the hallway
Clyde
Hey, here he comes!
Mr. Adler
Amazing book, Butters. [Mr. Garrison comes out of his classroom]
Butters
Thank you! [clasps his hands together and congratulates himself as he walks down the hallway]
Mrs. Streibel
You've changed my life, young man.
Butters
That's nice. [waves to everyone and walks on, but runs into Stan and the boys, who are mad at him]
Cartman
Butters, what the fuck do you think you're doing?!
Butters
Just enjoying myself. Why, Eric?
Kyle
Butters, you know goddamned well you didn't write that book!
Butters
But, you told me I did!
Stan
Yeah, but that was when we thought we were gonna get in trouble, asshole! [two girls rush up to Butters' aid]
Red
Hey hey, you leave Butters alone! He's a very fragile artist.
Lola
He's so brooding and full of angst.
Butters
Yeah, I'm broooding.
Cartman
Butters doesn't deserve any credit for Scrotie McBoogerballs! We deserve all the credit!
Rebecca
Oh God, you guys are pathetic!
Lola
Yeah, get a life and stop mooching off others' success for once. [the girls leave]
Stan
God-damnit!
Kyle
Butters, do you really think it's fair to lie like this?! Let me tell you, if you don't have the-
Butters
No, let me tell you somethin', fellers! You always take advantage of me, and after reading The Catcher in the Rye, I've learned you're nothing but phonies! I'm not letting you trick me this time! So the four of you can just suck on my wiener!
Cartman
That inconsiderate jerk!
The HBC logo pops up - a spoof of the NBC Peacock. What follows is an HBC News presentation
Announcer
Today on Today: We meet the author of the book that has swept the nation, and has now spawned TV's most popular game show, "How Long Can You Listen To Scrotie McBoogerballs On Audiobook" [the studio audience joins in] "And Not Vomit?" [a contestant is fitted with headphones and place in a soundproof booth. The front panel is a glass door so the audience can see the contestant's reaction without getting sprayed with vomit. It only takes two seconds of listening before the contestant vomits all over the door] The book is full of disgusting words and acts, including Sarah Jessica Parker, who is mentioned four hundred and sixty-five times. [a shot of Parker and her date at the Oscars] Matthew Broderick, are you upset your wife is made fun of so much in the book?
Broderick
Well, obviously. I just think it's wrong to make fun of anybody's physical appearance. My wife is a beautiful woman and I know that most people agree with me.
Announcer
Uh huh, and Matthew, how come a transvestite donkey witch is standing next to you, and why is it wearing a dress? [cut to a shot of the Stotch family sitting in Butters' room]
Matt Lauer
Joining us now is the author of the book, Leopold Stotch, along with his parents.
Stephen
Hello Matt
Linda
Hi everyone.
Matt Lauer
You must be pretty proud of your son.
Stephen
Oh, we certainly are. We're thrilled to learn he's so very talented.
Meredith Vieira
And we also learned that your son is grounded. Is that correct?
Stephen
Yes, we did have to ground him for the language in the novel of course.
Butters
I have to come right to my room after school.
Stephen
But we are very very proud nonetheless.
Al Roker
[chuckles] Young man, now that you are a respected author, have you met any famous people?
Butters
Not yet, but as soon as I'm not grounded anymore, I'm hopin' to meet Kim Kardashian. I wanna jump on her belly.
Matt Lauer
All right, uh, yeah huh. Butters, my favorite part of your novel was when Scrotie McBoogerballs slid his head up into the horse's [jumps off his stool and tries to vomit into a pail nearby, but misses. He vomits agin and this time gets it into the pail, burps, and coughs a few times, getting the last of the vomit into the pail, and finally spits. He gets back on the stool] Sorry, I uh, was that chapter a slam on health care reform as people suggested?
Butters
Uh... yeah, pretty much, I think, think so.
Meredith Vieira
Is that why the doctor character pulls out all the strings? [begins to vomit immediately]
Al Roker
Little boy, are you ever worried somebody might take your book wrong and try to kill someone, like when that guy tried to shoot Ronald Reagan after reading The Catcher in the Rye?
Butters
Oh, is that who the book was tellin' me to kill? Ohhh. [gets into a trance] Kill Ronald Reagan. [hops off his bed and heads for the door] Kill Ronald Reagan.
Al Roker
Ronald Reagan is dead now, Butters.
Butters
Oh really? [goes back to his bed] Oh yeah, gosh dangit.
Assembly Hall, day. Kenny, Cartman, Kyle, Stan and Sarah Jessica Parker are giving their speeches to the school board.
Stan
More and more of us are against this book every day! The author is cruel and offensive! And for these reasons, we demand this book be banned from all school, stores, and libraries! This book is nothing but smut and vulgarity purely for the sake of smut and vulgarity!
Assemblyman 1
That's just because you're too young to understand the underlying themes.
Cartman
There are no underlying themes! We know that for a fact!
Assemblyman 2
You just fail to understand what the author meant.
Kyle
The author meant to be as gross as possible because it was funny!
Assemblyman 3
[chuckles] No, no no, that's such a simplistic view.
Stan
Goddamnit there is no deeper meaning in this book! Read it again!
Assemblywoman 1
Oh, so you're suggesting that the author just arbitrarily made fun of Sarah Jessica Parker for no reason?
Kyle
Yes!
Assemblywoman 1
But what would be the point?
Cartman
There is no point! It's just because Sarah Jessica Parker is fuckin' ugly!
Assemblywoman 2
No writer would take the time to make fun of Sarah Jessica Parker just because they think she's ugly.
Stan, Kyle, Cartman
Yes they would!
Assemblywoman 2
It is because Miss Jessica Parker is a metaphor in the book for oppression felt by the lower class.
Stan
What? Dude, that is not in the book at all!
Assemblyman 2
Boys, this book is an important look at how liberals are hurting this country.
Stan
What?
Assemblywoman 2
Wait, Scrotie McBoogerballs is the most conservative-hating liberal in literature!
Assemblyman 2
What book did you read?!
Stan
There's nothing about liberals or conservatives!
Assemblyman 4
Ohohh yeah, then why did Sarah Jessica Parker's butt-cheese end up in Scrotie's milkshake? [an assemblyman nearby throws up]
Butters' house, day. A Channel 9 reporter stands across the street from it as a small crowd gathers around the front door and look up at Butters' window
Field Reporter
Breaking news from acclaimed author Leopold Stotch. The artist has announced that he is working on a second novel as a followup to his wildly successful bestseller. We got a statement from the writer, who is still grounded in his room. [The reporter and Butters are yelling at each other to be heard.]
Field Reporter
Can you give the public any idea what the new book is about?
Butters
Well, it's kind of about love and betrayal! The inner workings of the human mind!
Field Reporter
Will it be as sick and disgusting as your first book?
Butters
Oh it's raunchy alright! I know what my readers want, and I'm going to deliver!
Stephen
Butters, away from the window! You are being grounded!
Butters
Sorry Dad, I was just bein' the voice of a generation. [walks out of view]
Outside Assembly Hall, the boys sit on the curb. Sarah Jessica Parker stands next to a tree with a bare branch on which a bird sits
Stan
I can't believe they won't ban our book!
Kyle
I know! It's so much worse than Catcher in the retarded Rye!
Kenny
(It's fucking disgusting!)
Cartman
All right you guys, I know what we have to do. [stands up and walks onto the street] We've got to kill Sarah Jessica Parker.
Kyle
What?! [Stan's hands go from his chin to his knees]
Cartman
Think about it, guys. If somebody kills Sarah Jessica Parker, then they'll assume that somebody did it because of what was in the book. Then the book will get banned.
Kyle
Dude, we're not killing Sarah Jessica Parker! [Sarah Jessica Parker hears her name and looks at the boys]
Cartman
Shhh. [addresses Ms. Parker] Be right with you. [hushed tones to the other boys] We don't have to kill her, we can just help her get killed.
Stan
Shut up, Cartman! Just face it. We lost this one. [he and Kyle walk away]
Cartman
Kenny... we only have to help her get killed and then we totally get back at Butters.
Kenny
[looks over at Ms. Parker, then at Cartman] (Okay.)
Cartman
[turns and walks over to Ms. Parker] Ms. Jessica Parker, over here. [Kenny follows.]
The Today Show, an HBC News production
Matt
Well, the day has finally arrived. The eagerly awaited second novel from the author of Scrotie McBoogerballs hit the shelves this morning and apparently, bookstores are jammed.
Meredith
Al, how is it out there?
Al
[giggles] I don't know if you could see this, guys, but uh, the line stretches all the way around the block. People waiting for their turn to get inside the bookstore and read the novel. [the camera pans across the line from front to back and back again. The people in line smile and wave at the camera] And they brought trash bags and buckets to throw up in. Just a festive atmosphere here, Matt and Meredith.
Meredith
Well, we've got our vomit buckets ready too, because coming up, a very special in-studio treat.
Matt
That's right, we are going to have a reading of the first five chapters of the book here live in our studio. Na-now we must warn you that this is from the same author who wrote the most graphic, obscene novel of all time, so... brace yourselves for some very harsh language. Take it away Morgan Freeman.
a shot of Morgan Freeman sitting in a study, a fireplace to his left, a library to his right, preparing to read from Butters' second book
Morgan Freeman
[reading slowly, with gravitas] The Poop That Took A Pee Chapter 1: Douglas had to poop. His butt was all stinky because he had to poop so badly. There was a gross woman named Rebecca who was sunbathing all naked, and she was fat. Douglas walked up to her and said, "I need to poop." "Okay," Rebecca replied, "I like poop." Douglas squatted down [turns the page] over the fat sunbathing lady and went poop. The poop sat there on Rebecca's boobs looking like a wiener. [turns the page] Chapter 2...
The woods, day. A sign by the side of a road indicates that moose hunting season is here and the woods are open. Cartman and Kenny are standing in the bush. Kenny makes a moose call with his hands and mouth. They wait for a response. Kenny makes the call again
Cartman
See any hunters yet?
Kenny
(Not yet) [Ms. Parker is in a nearby clearing with moose horns attached to her head]
Cartman
Doing good, Ms. Jessica Parker! Just hang out, right there.
Kyle
Guys, stop, stop! [Kyle and Stan walk into view towards Cartman and Kenny] We don't have to do this!
Kenny
(Huh?)
Kyle
Butters wrote a second book!
Cartman
So what?
Stan
So dude, if Butters wrote a second book, then everyone's gonna know he couldn't have written the first one!
Kyle
We can get people to believe us now!
Cartman
Oh dude, sweet! [all four boys walk away, leaving Ms. Parker all alone at the mercy of any moose hunter that walks by her]
Cut to the in-studio reading of Butters' second novel
Morgan Freeman
"Why are we here?" Douglas cried as poop came out his wiener, in a long, thin strip. It was... wiener poop, which is the grossest poop of all.
Frontier Books, morning. The shoppers pick up where Morgan left off
Shopper 1
"The pee he got on the woman's leg, and she screamed, pooping out her boobs."
Shopper 2
"And so when the pee got mixed with the poop, it smelled like a butt."
Stan
[in store with the other boys] Aw dude, this is even lamer than we thought. [grins]
Cartman
People are gonna want Butters' head on a platter!
Shopper 3
Are you reading this, Marsha? What do you think?
Marsha
So far I think it's, it's incredible! Ih, it might be better than his first book.
Shopper 4
I agree. It wasn't as edgy, but it's like, he he's gone back to his roots.
Cartman
What?!
Stan
You can't be serious! You people like this?!
Shopper 5
Some of the imagery is unbelievable
Kyle
A woman pooping out her boobs is not good imagery!
Shopper 6
Says you! You must be a pro-life nut, huh? [slides into taunting] Didn't like what the book had to say?
Marsha
What are you talking about? This book is as pro-life as it gets!
Cartman
Oh come on!
Stan
God-damnit, will you people stop reading into stuff that isn't there!!
Shopper 7
"And the poop and the pee lived happily every after. The end." [closes the book...] Kill the phonies. Kill the phonies!
Keeping Up With The Kardashians is on the air
Kim
Today my sisters and I are gonna shop for underwear.
The Kardashians
Yaaay!
Male Guest
Can I go with you girls? [the seventh shopper breaks into the set and guns everyone down]
News report about the massacre
News Anchor 2
Our nation is still reeling from the tragic deaths of the Kardashians. The shooter claims he was driven to commit the slaughter immediately after reading The Poop That Took A Pee by Leopold "Butters" Stotch. It's all over. The Kardiashians.. [cries a bit and sheds a tear] wiped out. In the blink of an eye. All because one little PRICK... had to go and write a book.
Butters' room, day. Butters is at his desk with his face buried in his arms. The news report is airing on the TV in the background
News Anchor 2
Leopold Stotch... I HOPE THEY BURY YOU! ...YOU EVIL FUCK! [the anchorman falls silent and the door opens. Cartman and the other boys enter]
Cartman
Dude, people are pissed off at you, Butters.
Butters
I know.
Stan
They're saying they're gonna ban both your books now, completely. You're not making any more money!
Butters
[lifts his head up. He's been crying] You think I care about that? My writing got the most beautiful woman in the world killed! I loved her! And now she's gone and it's because of me!
Kyle
Ah... Oh Butters, [steps forward] it'll be all right. Listen, we've all learned that people look for meaning in books. And sometimes, even if it isn't there, they'll try and invent their own meaning.
Stan
Yeah, dude, eh, that's why we all need to avoid books and stick to television.
Butters
Thang, thanks, fellas. I'll definitely never write again. I think I can get through this.
Cartman
That's good, Butters, because, we need to tell you something.
Butters
What?
Cartman
[sighs heavily] You were sleepwalking again and dressed Sarah Jessica Parker up in a moose suit. You left her in the forest and she got shot by a hunter.
Butters
What?! Oh no!
Cartman
Yep, sorry. You're gonna have to come down and admit it was you. [walks out of the room with the other boys]
Butters
Aw. Aw I got her killed too? Aw uh, oh well, at least she was ugly. [leaves his desk and follows the other boys downstairs]
超噁心小說 結束
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